On 9/3/09 I had to watch as my precious animal (an 18 year old cat named Shamus) was euthanized. The pain of knowing he would die at that moment because I made the decision for him to do so, even if it WAS for his good, threatened to haunt me. But afterward, God impressed upon my heart that my suffering is only a small picture of what The Father felt as He watched His only Son die on the cross for ME. This truth reinforces in me the need to die daily to sin and self absorbtion. The Father made the painful decision to allow His only Son to die on our behalf so that by faith we could be saved from sin. And for His part, Jesus went willingly, the sacraficial Lamb, “for the joy that was set before Him, He endured the cross.” All I can say is, “Sanctify me, Lord! Help me to live for you alone. You are deserving!”
But God in His mercy did not rebuke me for my feelings of grief. He reinforced His understanding of my pain of loss by directing me to an email someone sent me a while ago. It was on u-tube. A 13 year old boy named Logan, who had to put his calf down, called into a Christian radio station to share what God had placed on his heart as he grieved. This is a worthwhile audio and I would encourage anyone who hasn’t listened to Logan’s testimony to look it up on u-tube. It is truly inspiring. God does not leave us comfortless. As Logan says, “He understands.”